It has been a couple of weeks into my decision and the initial euphoria is beginning to wane and give way to the reality of the day to day choices and challenges of being self-employed. I am still much happier than I have been in years and I know that I have made the right choice, even if there has yet to be a financial return. I continue to be filled with ideas and inspirations regarding my business and new life path but I admit to being surprised at how much longer things take to get “just right”.
Every day brings forth new challenges, and additional information that I could not have anticipated when I started, making the choices seem endless. There have been a couple of starts over the past few weeks that have come to a complete stop, or changed direction entirely. And I am certain there will be more of the same as I continue to develop and grow my business, and my new life.
All of this is quite manageable, but I have yet to fully throw myself into the service side of the business. I realize that I need to set a deadline for finishing the necessary foundation building of the business to ensure that I don’t become trapped in perpetually creating, and not doing. I understand the importance of a solid foundation, but at the same time, dotting i’s and crossing t’s can end up being a little tedious and take the excitement out of the momentum.
Add to this the quiet gnawing of uncertainty, and the primal instinct of survival and it becomes a challenge to stay focused and inspired to continue on this new path. The old familiar path is tempting and also has a proven track record for working. This new path is exactly that – NEW, and completely unproven.
So now it becomes a test of Trust and Faith. A test of keenly tuning in to my intuition, and finding the strength to act on that information, even when my primal instinct kicks in and I feel the pull to go with the safe choice. It is a time of putting aside my ego (not easy) and balancing my decisions with intuition and common sense, while at the same time not losing sight of my goals or creating additional stress and chaos.
It’s about staying the course, despite outside factors battering down your wall of resolve. It’s about taking one day at a time, and doing all you can in that moment with the best intention and utmost authenticity.
Today I feel the pressure of outside factors knocking on my wall, I feel the pull of my survival instinct, but I still believe in the direction I am going and the choices I am making, and so I will stay the course.